Category: Relationships

Marrying At This Age Is Linked To The Lowest Divorce Risk

Getting married at this age linked to lowest divorce risk.

Getting married at this age is linked to the lowest divorce risk.

Getting married at 28 to 32 years old carries the lowest risk of divorce, according to statistics on marriage.

Marriage before the late twenties, or after the thirties are both linked to a higher risk of divorce later on.

The marriages most likely to end in divorce are between teenagers or those in their early twenties, or those who get married after the age of 45.

Waiting to get married until you are 25 instead of 20, for example, reduces the risk of divorce by 50 percent.

The conclusions come from an analysis of a national survey of families that included over 9,000 people.

Dr Nick Wolfinger, who conducted the analysis, writes:

“Delaying marriage from the teens until the early twenties produces the largest declines in divorce risk, for totally understandable reasons: we’re all changing a lot more from year to year as teenagers than when we’re in our twenties or thirties.

Our parents and friends are likely to disapprove of a teenage marriage, but their feelings probably won’t change much once we hit our mid-twenties.”

It makes sense that delaying marriage until later in your twenties is beneficial.

However, why does getting married in your late thirties or forties present a higher risk of divorce?

Dr Wolfinger write:

“…the kinds of people who wait till their thirties to get married may be the kinds of people who aren’t predisposed toward doing well in their marriages.

For instance, some people seem to be congenitally cantankerous.

Such people naturally have trouble with interpersonal relationships.

Consequently they delay marriage, often because they can’t find anyone willing to marry them.

When they do tie the knot, their marriages are automatically at high risk for divorce.”

Related

The study was published on the Institute For Family Studies website (Wolfinger, 2015).

The Personality Type That Is Easiest To Read At First Glance

The study tested how good we are at assessing a stranger’s personality in a few minutes.

The study tested how good we are at assessing a stranger’s personality in a few minutes.

The personalities of happy, confident people are particularly easy to read at first glance.

It may be because happier people are more likely to project their true personalities.

However, even the personalities of those lower in well-being are relatively easy to read, the research revealed.

The study tested the ability to assess other people’s personalities when speed dating.

It emerged that most can make reasonably accurate judgements about major aspects of personality, such as how open, extraverted and agreeable another person is.

However, some people are much easier to read than others, said Ms Lauren Gazzard Kerr, the study’s first author:

“Some people are open books whose distinctive personalities can be accurately perceived after a brief interaction, whereas others are harder to read.

Strikingly, people who report higher well-being, self-esteem, and satisfaction with life tend to make the task easier.”

The study used a speed dating format in which 372 people met for the first time for only a few minutes.

Afterwards, they were each asked to rate the personality of the person they had met.

The results revealed that the impressions they formed were generally accurate.

However, people were worse at judging the personalities of potential romantic partners than strangers in whom they had no romantic interest.

Perhaps nerves were getting in the way.

One thing emerged strongly: the personalities of happier people are easier to read at first glance.

Dr Lauren Human, study co-author, said:

“Perhaps people that have greater well-being behave in ways that are more in line with their personality — being more authentic or true to themselves.”

Alternatively, it may be that some people tend to be happier because their personalities are perceived more accurately by those they meet.

The researchers next want to find out why some people’s personalities are easier to read, explained Dr Human:

“Understanding why some people are able to be seen more accurately could help us determine strategies that other people could apply to enhance how accurately they are perceived.”

Related

The study was published in the Journal of Research in Personality (Kerr et al., 2020).

When It Comes To Love, More Affection Matters — Not Who Gives It (M)

Does total warmth matter more than balance in romantic relationships?

Does total warmth matter more than balance in romantic relationships?

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This Personality Type Is Most Likely To Cheat

While men are guided by their personality, women’s loyalty is tied directly to the health of the bond.

While men are guided by their personality, women’s loyalty is tied directly to the health of the bond.

Men with performance anxiety who like to take risks are most likely to cheat.

Women, though, tend to cheat if they are dissatisfied with their relationship.

The standard of a man’s relationship does not have much effect on whether he cheats; instead, it is his personality that matters.

The study supports the stereotype that men who are cheaters will continue to cheat, whatever kind of partnership they are in.

Risk-takers tend to be impulsive and can have problems controlling themselves.

Gambling, drug-taking and aggressive behaviour can all be signs of someone who is a risk-taker.

Cheating is one more way for this type of man to find excitement.

The pattern is different among women, where unhappiness in their current relationship predicts cheating.

In fact, women who are dissatisfied with their relationship are twice as likely to cheat on their partner as those who are satisfied.

One-in-five are unfaithful

The study included almost one thousand men and women in (supposedly) monogamous relationships.

The results showed that 23 percent of men and 19 percent of women admitted being unfaithful at some point.

Men’s infidelity was predicted by personality factors like risk-taking.

Professor Milhausen, who led the study, said:

“All kinds of things predict infidelity.

What this study says is that when you put all of those things together, for men, personality characteristics are so strong they bounce everything else out of the model.

For women, in the face of all other variables, it’s still the relationship that is the most important predictor.”

Related

The study was published in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior (Mark et al., 2011).

2 Attachment Styles That Cause Chaos In Relationships

Certain types of anxiety can cause massive ups and downs in relationships.

Certain types of anxiety can cause massive ups and downs in relationships.

Partners who have attachment issues can cause considerable instability in their relationship.

One type, known as ‘attachment anxiety’ by psychologists, involves see-sawing feelings.

It is the same reason that babies cry when they are taken from their mothers.

Around one in five people has an anxious attachment style.

A classic sign is having wildly varying feelings about the relationship from one day to the next.

People experiencing attachment anxiety spend a lot of time thinking about what the other person wants.

They can easily move from feeling strongly attached to wanting independence.

Ms Ashley Cooper, the study’s first author, said:

“For people anxious in their attachments, they have anxiety as to whether the person is going to be there for them and whether they are worthy of others.

I was interested in how attachment security impacted partners’ experiences in their relationship on a daily basis.

Some couples experience instability from one day to the next in their relationship, so we sought out to explore what could increase or decrease this volatility.”

The second problematic type is attachment avoidance: this describes someone who wants to avoid getting too attached to the other person.

Around one in four people has an avoidant attachment style.

High levels of attachment anxiety are linked to more ups and downs in the relationship, while avoidance is linked to low relationship satisfaction.

The study of 157 couples — half of whom had been dating for two years or less — found that high attachment avoidance in one partner was linked to low relationship satisfaction for both.

Ms Cooper said:

“For the average person, stay attuned to what your partner is saying and avoid making assumptions that can escalate conflict.

Trusting in your partner and your relationship is important to daily interactions and stability for your relationship.”

Related

The study was published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships (Cooper et al., 2017).

How Your Sexual Orientation Predicts What Makes You Jealous (M)

Forget the old ‘men vs women’ narrative — jealousy evolves across a spectrum, not a divide.

Forget the old 'men vs women' narrative — jealousy evolves across a spectrum, not a divide.

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Why Talking Through Relationship Issues Relieves Women, But Frustrates Men

Men and women use different methods to deal with negative emotions in long-term relationships.

Men and women use different methods to deal with negative emotions in long-term relationships.

Men and women in long-term relationships deal with difficulties in different ways.

Men do not like to express negative emotions and tend to feel frustrated when trying to give or receive emotional support.

However, studies show that giving more emotional support can improve relationships, as can listening from the heart.

Women, though, feel more sadness and worry and prefer to express those negative emotions.

Unlike men, women prefer to talk through issues and offer support.

Women also feel better if they can give and receive support, unlike men, who only seem to feel frustration.

Professor Deborah Carr, the study’s first author, said:

“The men don’t really want to talk about it or spend too much time thinking about it.

Men often don’t want to express vulnerable emotions, while women are much more comfortable expressing sadness or worry.”

The conclusions come from a study of 722 couples who had been married for an average of 39 years.

They were asked about their marital experience and how their spouse reacted to and affected them.

The results showed that giving and receiving support tended to make women feel better, but not men.

Naturally, men also reported receiving more emotional support from their wives.

However, women tended to feel more strain in their relationships.

Professor Carr said:

“For women, getting a lot of support from their spouse is a positive experience.

Older men, however, may feel frustrated receiving lots of support from their wife, especially if it makes them feel helpless or less competent.”

Sadness, worry and frustration are the negative emotions most frequently reported by long-term couples.

Professor Carr said:

“Men who provide high levels of support to their wives may feel this frustration if they believe that they would rather be focusing their energies on another activity.”

The results of this study may be partly down to the older generation involved.

Younger couples may have different patterns.

Related

The study was published in the The Journals of Gerontology Series B: Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences (Carr et al., 2016).

The Common Social Bonds That Could Help You Live Longer

Study found reduced risk of cancer, stroke and heart disease.

The study found a reduced risk of cancer, stroke and heart disease.

More social ties at a younger age are linked to better physical well-being later on.

The physical benefits include a lower risk of many long-term health problems, including stroke, heart disease and cancer.

The study comes on top of earlier findings that older adults also live longer if they have more social connections.

Professor Kathleen Mullan Harris, one of the study’s authors, said:

“Based on these findings, it should be as important to encourage adolescents and young adults to build broad social relationships and social skills for interacting with others as it is to eat healthy and be physically active.”

For adolescents, the researchers found, larger social networks protected against inflammation and obesity.

For older adults, being socially isolated was worse for health than either hypertension or diabetes.

Professor Harris said:

“The relationship between health and the degree to which people are integrated in large social networks is strongest at the beginning and at the end of life, and not so important in middle adulthood, when the quality, not the quantity, of social relationships matters.”

The study drew from four nationally representative surveys in the US.

Social relationships were taken into account along with key markers of physical health like waist circumference, body mass index and blood pressure.

Professor Yang Claire Yang, the study’s first author, said:

“We studied the interplay between social relationships, behavioral factors and physiological dysregulation that, over time, lead to chronic diseases of aging — cancer being a prominent example.

Our analysis makes it clear that doctors, clinicians, and other health workers should redouble their efforts to help the public understand how important strong social bonds are throughout the course of all of our lives.”

The study was published in the journal PNAS (Yang et al., 2015).

A Loving Way To Reduce Stress In A Crisis

People were given a stress test involving putting their hand into cold water.

People were given a stress test involving putting their hand into cold water.

Under stress, thinking about your romantic partner is enough to reduce blood pressure.

In fact, thinking about your partner is just as effective at reducing blood pressure as having them there in person.

For the study, 102 people were given a stress test involving putting their hand into cold water.

The results showed that thinking about, or having your partner in the room, lowered blood pressure.

Dr Kyle Bourassa, the study’s first author, said:

“This suggests that one way being in a romantic relationship might support people’s health is through allowing people to better cope with stress and lower levels of cardiovascular reactivity to stress across the day.

And it appears that thinking of your partner as a source of support can be just as powerful as actually having them present.”

The study helps explain why people who are in love have better physical health.

Dr Bourassa said:

“Life is full of stress, and one critical way we can manage this stress is through our relationships—either with our partner directly or by calling on a mental image of that person.

There are many situations, including at work, with school exams or even during medical procedures, where we would benefit from limiting our degree of blood pressure reactivity, and these findings suggest that a relational approach to doing so can be quite powerful.”

Related

The study was published in the journal Psychophysiology (Bourassa et al., 2019).

The Beauty-Status Trade-Off: How Your Income Affects Your Partner’s Waistline (M)

One partner’s rising status could trigger unexpected shifts in  the health and appearance of the other.

One partner’s rising status could trigger unexpected shifts in  the health and appearance of the other.

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